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Archive for stories – Page 2

On Grief, Four Scarecrows, and Letting Go

Grief is so weird. Of that I am sure. The trick seems to be figuring out what to hold on to and what to let go. And, for me, learning how to honor a person’s place in your life — as challenging as that place was — and giving yourself permission to move on.

I put out “the scarecrows” on our porch this weekend. They’ve been part of our fall celebrations as long as my kids have been alive, sitting right there by the window with their same disproportionate smiles. And this year, there are only four. 

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A Seeker’s Moment: 5 Lessons from Covid-19

Watercolor - Seek and you shall find

“Every moment of one’s existence, one is growing into more or retreating into less.” ~ Norman Mailer

I’ve been thinking about growth this week, and irony. Over the last few months in our neck of the woods, we’ve seen the whole of nature shake off the dust of a dormant winter season and sprout into new growth, spring blossoms and early summer fruit. Yet, in one of life’s inevitable ironies, it seems like much of life has been at a standstill as we enter week 15 of quarantine, shelter in place and the socially distant realities of the Coronavirus pandemic. With schools closed, travel plans cancelled, favorite activities interrupted, and time with family limited, an uncertainty-fueled fatigue threatens to lull us into merely sitting. And waiting.

In truth, God’s great earth teaches that there is no real time of stagnance. No mere status quo, no simple biding of time, no true standstill. There is only growing. And dying. Even dormant days can provide rest and regeneration that contribute to the next growing season, or they degenerate into spoil and decay. As Norman Mailer wrote, “Every moment of one’s existence, one is growing into more or retreating into less.”

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keep . The Blessing of Beginning Again

To begin again is such a blessing – an opportunity to revel in what may be hovering ahead on the horizon. But, it’s a blessing that sometimes gets a bad rap. I’ve had a few “starting over” seasons in my life, and I’ve noticed they tend to be heavily burdened with the failure or loss of whatever season came before. We steady our hands for a newness thrust upon us, like we’ve scribbled some errant message and, with a heavy sigh, had to tear out the page, wad it up and toss it behind us.
 
It’s different with a new year. Maybe it’s the predictability that makes the difference, but we seem to turn the page to January with much more acceptance. With more grace — for ourselves, for where we’ve been and where we’re going. We give ourselves permission to embrace something new. And, we celebrate the beginning, relishing the opportunity to retool and tweak life goals and daily decisions alike. The start of the new year offers an anticipated blessing of beginning again — the chance to bring forward what serves us and leave behind what may be holding us back. No strings attached.
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5 Lessons on Dream Catching [May printable calendar]

Last month, I started working on some of my goals for 2019. Last month. Yes, with one quarter of the year gone, I finally began putting some time into that burgeoning list of ideas I’ve been wanting to add flesh and paint to. I guess that makes me a late bloomer. It’s easy to scold myself and get discouraged with the delays and shifts in plans and even with my own resistance to putting in the work. But, instead, a few weeks ago, I decided to give myself a “talking to” as we say in the South, and embrace the notion that late blooms are still blooms. Their lateness just leaves longer for loveliness to germinate. That’s the inspiration for the mini print I’ve included in this month’s printable calendar – shared as you continue reading in ALL its tardiness! It’s also the motivation behind the trove of painted sketches in various stages of completion and a few lessons I’m trying to teach myself about capturing dreams.

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keep . Good Night Prayers

I’ve been thinking lately about the things in our lives that help us create family, the experiences and qualities of “home” that knit us together and create the safe place we need to become confident in our best selves. After my husband, Mike, died, we were all engulfed in this wave of sorrow and change and uncertainty, and for my children, a sea of confusion and lack of understanding – an ill-defined sense of loss and insecurity. It was all very natural, and in many ways still an ongoing process at various stages of resolution, even six years later. But, during those early days of grief, I felt so strongly that I needed to focus on making sure our home was a place of security and honesty, where all feelings were welcome and peace would reign. Home-keeping. A tall order in a very chaotic and confusing time of adjustment.

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